Today as I was trying to eat my lunch, while my baby was screaming hysterically, my husband was calling me, and my house was a disaster I found myself saying out loud "This is NOT my life!" And not in that "Oh thank God for this wonderfully exciting life" kind-of-way!
As I picked up my freshly changed 3 month old, he simultaneously crapped his pants and threw up all over himself, and me. I had just worked up the energy to change out of my pjs, so that I could feel semi-human.
It's moments like that I am tempted to rant on Twitter or Facebook, text my husband and complain, or breakdown in tears. Sometimes I just take a picture and upload it on Instagram, so others can share in our moments! ;)
I started undressing Bennett, and decided that even though it was so out of my routine, I would bath him, and hopefully this would allow him to relax. We slowed everything down, and I thought for sure he would finally go down for a nap with ease. As I placed him in his crib he began crying hysterically. I had to walk away for a minute and just sit on my bed, to naturally think of what I could do next. As I was going through the list of next steps, I heard quietly "Have you prayed about it?".
Seems so simple. Too easy. Almost a way of giving up. You know, that phrase "well, all I guess we can do now is pray!"
It releases control of my little life, and the routine I so comfortably like to follow. He causes me to believe in faith that God cares about more then just the big picture, but the minute factors that accumulate to make up my day.
As I walked back into Bennett's room, I picked him up and held him, and I started praying. It was so simple, I don't even remember what I said. As I finished our talk with God, Bennett looked up at me, smiled, and turned his head, falling asleep in my arms. Peace fell over our house.
Sometimes I forget that prayer is more then just a time set aside where I solely talk to God. I forget that I am called to "pray without ceasing", because He cares for every aspect and second of my life.
He is there in every moment and situation, willing and wanting to help. Sometimes He is waiting for me to stop trying to figure it all out, and have the faith to ask.